"If failure had no penalty, success would not be a prize"

Ah Sir Terry Pratchett. In terms of reflection, it's too him, I always find solace. Behind his wit, was someone with a great intelligence. It's a shame because he wrote fantasy, people didn't see that. Lately, I've been getting my head round, a need to refocus and regroup. There has been a failure on my part to come to times with that fact. I need to accept; In three weeks time, it is very unlikely I will be running a sub 4 hour Marathon. And that's ok. In many ways, it is a failure, but it's not a failure of a plan, it's been a failure to respect how hard training for a Marathon is, whilst having to deal with life. I haven't really been focused on one thing, there has just been a lot to juggle and sort out. It's lead me to not really focus on things and well, If I went out and tried to go for a four hour Marathon in three weeks, I'd crash and burn. Hard.

So let's look at what's been going on: Hayfever. At least I think it is. My Asthma has been bad lately, and it's been resulting in me using my inhalers a lot. My eyes are crippled on runs if I go up the hills, and I think tree pollen is to blame. The inhalers have also given me thrush, which is gross and yeah. All of this has been impacting my running etc, but I have some blood tests in a few weeks, so hopefully that will help me get to the bottom of it. Fred Whitton. Not happening. It's been a pain to sort logistically and I think it's too soon after the Marathon and just could lead to a repeat of the mistakes of last year. So I've deferred till 2026, when I can build around the event and give it the respect it needs. Adoption stuff. Monkey needs some support and getting said support is exhausting and needs a lot of focus for me and Em. We are trying to do our best and mange till funding comes, but it often means, while one of us gets a much earned rest, the other is exhausted. Thankfully, we continue to be on the same page and helping and being there for one another. But it's been a hard phase. Work Busy, busy busy. But good, good, good. I needed the challenge of this job, I feel I have a purpose professionally again, but it means time is at a premium for training and I'm not sure I've used it right at times. Training I've managed a long run of 16 Miles, around 3 times now. My pace is not where it should be and trying to balance cycling and running has been an ask. But where I've been crap is the resting and the short runs. Yoga is starting to help and now I need to give respect to the short runs and not just rely on my long runs. Back-up So with all that in, I have had to back-up and rethink. I've brought a new watch, as my old one has died. This has been a motivator. Some new trainers are on the way. I have the bike booked for a service. The clocks changing and the good weather have helped. I got out on a good ride yesterday and a long run today, Things are not all bad. Refocus So as I say, the failure has been in my approach, so from here what do I try to do. Well firstly not running 4 hours next week is not a failure, it's a step on the road to the prize. I've signed up for another Marathon and an Ultra, if I can work on all I've identified, a 4 hour marathon remains the prize this year. Who knows if I'll succeed. So what would be success in three weeks Getting 26 done, I've struggled to get close to 20, so a Marathon is a big ask. It's a mental thing I think. I know I can do the distance and I'm not sure what the block is. Maybe it's finding road running dull, so I need to find a route that will interest me. And a real success? Anything near 4 hours 30 Mins, I've managed under that time 3 times, but not since 2021. So showing I can get down in that ball park, feels a good start. So there we are, I need to get to a place of not seeing myself as failed already, just a revamp, remotive, regroup and remember the long game. And to quote Sir Terry again: "If you trust in yourself. . .and believe in your dreams. . .and follow your star. . . you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy."  So today we rest, tomorrow we go again, lets make the virtual Marathon a success.